Postcard #2, "Can't Remember"

Can’t remember how much I already told you--- Can’t remember much at all---Must assume you are under-informed---The situation is urgent---The national language is in jeopardy---Common nouns are accused of murder---Modifiers are under house arrest---Verbs have been shanghaied---Conjunctions sterilized, expletives deleted---Prepositions have plea-bargained, turned state’s evidence---All punctuation is bugged---Semicolons the latest in web-based monitoring devices---Resort to older technologies---typewriters and transistor radios are safe--Study the Great Vowel Shift for clues---More to come.